Tuesday, June 4, 2013

It's a Blur......



My oldest son -- Ben -- turned 14 recently.  Time is such a blur.  So true:  The days are long, but the years are short.

I look back at his baby pictures -- such shallow images of our precious time together.  Where is the depth?  The fatigue, the pure joy, the softness of his new skin, his content little suckles at my breast?  Why couldn't I capture that in a picture?   Where is his giggle, his laugh? {And we didn’t have high def digital pictures back then ---  arg!!!!!)

Hours Old

One week old

One of my fave pictures of Ben

Oh, that I had not been so tired to write down more. His stories, his sermons {at age three}. his own best super hero. {Star Coswald In Spanish.  Don’t ask. We don’t know why. Which makes it even sweeter.}  His Ben-isms {“Daddy, I think I swallowed a bug,” he said after the first time he threw up.}

Now, I know it sounds like I'm wallowing in the past.  We have today and by God's grace many more todays to remember. I’m just struck at how fast this has all gone by.

This was his first birthday since we began homeschooling {at birth} that we had to have a school day on his birthday.

"This is the last time I'll ever have to do school on my birthday, <Mom."
"Why?" I ask.
"Because next year, I can work harder on Monday to get it all done for my Tuesday birthday."

Photo 2
14 came so fast!


He's learning, I think.  This hard year of consequences hopefully has paid off.

We always have the birthday person's favorite foods for breakfast, lunch and dinner. This year: bacon and French toast for breakfast, subs on a sub roll + chips for lunch (with Adventures in Odyssey as our background entertainment) and buffalo wings for dinner.

                  Photo 1
                       Luke and I happy for the bday boy.
Photo 4
Levi and Dave enjoying good food and company

Surprise cake for dessert.  None of that embarrassing singing in a restaurant for my shy guy.  I know he appreciated that.

Photo 6
My heart explodes with love for them all.
Dear God,
Grab hold of Ben's heart, and don't let go.  Let his heart stay open to you, your Truth, your Son, and His leading.  Let him follow you all his days.  Let him lean on you in good times and hard times.  Let his faith never waiver.  Let him be a man of God, honoring you as a witness in this world.
It is hard raising him sometimes, God.  Cover my mistakes with your grace and love and mercy.  Give me wisdom that I surely do not have to walk and talk with him as he becomes more of a man.  Give his dad the strength and wisdom he needs to walk his first born to adulthood and beyond.
Thank you for trusting us with him, Lord.

Photo 5
Sorry, buddy, you'll always be my Baby Ben.  

1 comment:

Masters Family said...

Such sweet words Alane. A mother's love for her son is such a precious thing. Love watching you be a Mom to your awesome boys!!